Wednesday, February 8, 2012

the sweetest revenge

Is it more potent to stay silent and smile my tears away, or to act cool but plot a secret and more destructive vengeance? I'm never one to stand to the side, but then again, Korea isn't my playing field, so maybe just this once, I shouldn't fight back.

The problem is, this isn't just once; this is the second time I've been screwed over by a stupid guy. I've never not had a chance with a guy I'm interested in. Boys I like have always liked me back, and in the States, always pursued me. The rules here are a bit different though. This is the first time I've been teased. I have never been "the other girl" because I'm so used to being the girl. I don't like this new feeling much.

It isn't like I've ever been looking for a relationship, either. But the opportunities keep arising, and then are snatched away just as fast.

This is the longest time -- six months -- I've gone without a relationship. Unless I count the few guys here and there I've gone out with. But I don't -- they were trivial and I had a little fun with them, nothing more.

I hate the feeling of being single.